


what is love?

by desolate_dinosaur



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Character Study, Families of Choice, Feelings Realization, Gen, Not Beta Read, Platonic Relationships, Relationship Study, Usui Masumi-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 20:47:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29781876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/desolate_dinosaur/pseuds/desolate_dinosaur
Summary: Masumi doesn't understand what love is.
Relationships: Spring Troupe & Usui Masumi, Tachibana Izumi & Usui Masumi
Kudos: 20





	what is love?

**Author's Note:**

> *I changed the title because I realized how there's some certain words that end with "-philia" and every time I pass by my own fic and read the word "philia," I absolutely think back to these certain words and it just makes me generally uncomfortable so I had to change it.
> 
> I really wanted to finish writing all 14 stories that I planned for February but because my parents found out how badly I’m doing in school, I had to focus on my assignments, which I didn’t and I’m totally fucked today because there’s going to be an online conference about my progress in school and I have done absolutely nothing despite the chances I was given. In other words, this will probably be the only thing I post for a while because I’m going to be grounded for sure. My birthday is also coming up soon (it’s at the end of this month though; the day after Masumi's; aka March 31st; I'm turning 16 this year) so this is really unfortunate that I’m going to be probably grounded the entire month. :(

It’s strange.

Masumi was sure that what he felt for Izumi was love, was it not?

As more people started joining MANKAI Company, the definition of love began to blur in Masumi’s eyes. He thought he only felt these certain feelings for only Izumi. She was the first person who actually seemed to care about his own wellbeing. What she had for him was love, was it not?

So, why is he feeling the same thing that he felt for Izumi in Tsuzuru? He was annoying at first. The way he nagged Masumi to do this, to do that; why would he care about what Masumi’s doing? It was unnecessary and strangely, Masumi appreciated it. He didn’t show it, of course, but Masumi did his best to return the care that Tsuzuru gave, whether it’s just putting a new hot mug of coffee on his desk while he wrote a new script or making sure that the document was saved if Tsuzuru passed out in the middle of his writing.

The same thing he felt for Izumi and Tsuzuru, he felt it again with Itaru. It pissed Masumi off more than anything, to think he has fallen in love with a fake like Itaru. Then again, Itaru taught Masumi to be more honest with himself if he wanted Izumi to fall in love with him, despite being a hypocrite. Can’t he take his own advice?

Citron was always watching him. It was creepy and Masumi can’t help but feel like he was experiencing a horror game. But, Citron always helped Masumi out whenever he had worries that he never told anyone about. Like, at the beginning when Spring Troupe was practicing their debut play, Citron was with him when they were watching Sakuya struggle and he was the one who suggested beginning morning practice so early to help Sakuya out. Citron may seem so carefree, but he shows that he cares in different ways. 

That warm, fuzzy feeling, like a heated blanket wrapping around his body in the middle of winter. Was it not love? Did he just never love Izumi in the first place? Or did he just love Izumi, Tsuzuru, Itaru, and Citron altogether? 

It happened the same thing when Chikage joined. Chikage helped teach Masumi some tricks that could impress the director. Masumi was busy having fun learning some of the hand tricks with Chikage that he also didn’t realize that it was Chikage who he was having fun with. This was all for Izumi, his one and only love, right? Chikage is just one of his many love rivals.

Sakuya was no different with the others. Well, he is. He’s pure and honest, that it even brings Masumi to worry about Sakuya’s safety. Though, Sakuya isn’t the leader of the Spring Troupe for no reason. There were many times when Sakuya helped Masumi out, whether at the dorm, in school, or outside. For one instance, he helped take Masumi out of the group of fangirls that kept slowing him down from reaching the dormitory and meeting the director. When he thought he got rejected by the director, Sakuya also comforted him.

So, why is he feeling the feelings he felt for Izumi in everyone else?

Masumi is sure that what he felt for his peers wasn't love. Although they cared for him and he cared for them, it wasn’t love. It’s not love. Then, what did he have for Izumi? If he felt the same thing he did for the others with Izumi, what was he feeling for Izumi? Was it not love? What is love anyways?

The courtyard was relaxing at night, when everyone’s tired and not energetic enough to move around. It wasn’t complete silence; Masumi could still hear Itaru yelling at his game and some of the actors were practicing their lines during this time. It was the type of silence where he was alone but didn’t feel like it. A different type of silence to when he was back at his father’s home where even though there was a lot of people around, it felt like he was the only person who was there.

“Masumi, so that’s where you’ve been.”

It’s the director’s voice.

Masumi quickly stood up straight, lighting up at the sight of her. The wind gently blows her hair as she pulls a strand of her brown hair behind her ear. She looked like a goddess. Though, Masumi is now aware of what he’s feeling, and what he’s feeling wasn’t love. It was more similar to how he felt towards his grandmother.

Izumi hums concernedly, noticing the silence coming from Masumi. “Isn’t it cold outside?” she asked, concerned, starting the conversation with small talk. Masumi could only shrug, staring at the sky. Izumi only grew more concerned about the way Masumi is acting. Maybe towards the others, it makes sense, but Masumi has always been attached to her. “Tsuzuru told me that you haven’t got back to your room but since he’s working on Spring Troupe’s play, he’s busy on his computer. I got worried so I came to look for you. I’m glad that nothing bad happened to you,” she explained, taking a seat on the grass and looking at the sky.

The stars were pretty tonight. They sat under the stars without speaking.

Until, Masumi finally sucks in his breath and asks, “What is love?”

Izumi’s eyes widened at the question. She didn’t expect a question like this from Masumi. She hummed a bit, contemplating on the answer. “Well… there’s no exact form of love,” she starts, “but love is when you care about the other person and you want them to be happy.”

“Then, do I love you, Tsuzuru, Itaru, Citron, Chikage, and Sakuya?” he asked, bluntly. Izumi’s eyes widened even more. She didn’t expect this question either. Though, being a teenage boy who practically lived alone, she could understand why he could be confused with his feelings.

“Maybe,” Izumi answered, slowly. If she answered incorrectly, then Masumi could misunderstand, and as his current guardian, she has to guide him on the correct path. “There are different types of love. There’s an unsure amount. Some might say there’s four, others might say there’s 12. I think it just ties down to two roots: romantic and platonic.”

Masumi scrunches his face up in confusion. “Then, what type of love am I feeling?” he asked.

“That’s up for you to choose,” Izumi answered, laying her head on her knees. She trusts that Masumi is smart enough to figure out the answer for himself. She just needs to guide him to it. “What do you think you feel for me?”

It was the same type of love that he felt for his grandmother. He doesn’t want to make out with his grandmother. It was the same type of love he felt for Sakuya, Tsuzuru, and the rest of his peers, but he doesn’t want to marry them. That was platonic love. And, if he felt the same thing he did for them in Izumi, then what he had for Izumi is platonic.

He saw them as family, not romantic interests.

Masumi lets out a relaxed huff, smiling a bit. His mind was at ease, finally figuring out what he was truly feeling. Izumi notices and smiles as well, already knowing full well what he chose.

**Author's Note:**

> Anyways, I'm going to disappear now, since I'll be grounded in three hours.


End file.
